Testify of Christ

To be honest to myself, the internet, and my faith - lately I have been contemplating and trying to better understand what it means to come to know Christ - and by association, what it means to know myself and others. And I have been struggling with it more than I'd like.


My friend Sheila - from my programme here in London recently asked me how my last year has impacted my faith. And it got a bit shaky in the last few months, with finishing up dissertation, trying to travel, keep up with friends and family - hello, brother is surprise engaged.... I tend to over-think things... this doesn't mean faith shouldn't be thought of, because it is a very active part of my life. Just, I tend to focus and over-think in regards to fear and doubt, which doesn't aid decision making.

Anyway.

I answered her that it was trying for a bit but seems to have resolved and I am stronger for it. And where I believe this to be true, and where the big waves are over there are still smaller waves of doubt that I am dealing with. One of them is that despite doing all I can to come unto Christ, I don't know what that means and I don't feel that close to Him as a person. I feel very strongly that what He teaches is true and good - I just don't know how I'm to get to know HIM... you know?

But before I start panicking, I think it is wise to focus on what I do know to be true.

I know that while I don't have a clue what I'm doing in the next few months, I do know that I am deeply loved and that Heavenly Father has a plan for me.

I know that the gospel is founded on love and when we keep that in perspective, things begin to make sense even if the specific answers aren't there.

I know that when I freak out, I can find peace in the gospel - through thoughtful discussions and inspired words.

And I am so grateful that this semester/term we get to focus on Christ and build that corner stone and come to know Him a bit better.