True to form, I now have a (probably unclear) example from
my life for you. See, in college, I had a friend who was very fun and persuasive.
He told me all about this ‘dating game’ and all sorts of rules, and ways to get
someone to date you.
I didn’t like it – it felt so manipulative and deceitful.
So, I began to think the whole world was this way, and I would (until recently)
associate all flirting with this game. It didn’t help that all sorts of books
depict the ‘bad guy’ as a manipulator, or in chick-flick, there’s always the
girl you don’t like who manipulates the guy for a while (Caroline Bingley). Anyway,
I began to view flirting as negative. I mean, I wouldn’t want to be with
someone for eternity that had to be manipulated into being attracted to me.
But, like all areas in life, there is a balance.
The definition of deliberate has gotten skewed in this aspect
for me. Let’s be deliberate in seeking worthy things, like education, a
fulfilling job, improving ourselves, and of course our testimonies. Let’s pay a
little more attention and defend what is important by stratagem. We can be
smart, plan ahead, critically think and act, and become better people, and
improve our lives, deliberately. And we’ll watch our growth dramatically
increase.
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